Mumma Thinks I Am His Servant -The Importance of Household Chores

This was not a big thing at first, but more I thought about it…. I was Hurt!

kids tantrums
courtesy: Google
We as moms try again and again to make lives of our kids perfect, we try to fulfill their wishes to the best of our abilities but as a parent, sometimes it seems like our day is filled with an endless stream of backtalk from your kids.
My kid is just 4, being the youngest and the first born in a Big Fat Indian Joint Family he is a pampered one and I am the sole person who sees they do not go overboard with it. So basically, I am the bad Guy (mom’s usually are).
I am very particular about asking him to carry out the tasks that I feel he is perfectly capable of doing, like: keeping his toys away after he is done playing, keeps his shoes at the proper place, fetches his own glass of water etc.
But always felt somehow he was small to carry out tasks for others. Whenever someone asks him to fetch water me being the supermom I tend to be comes to his rescue, tumbling over…running… falling… reaching out before he even gets up.  At first he used to try to do some of the chores, but after a while he knew unlike the Gotham city which signals Batman for help his so called Super Mom is keeping his vigilant watch over him and will rescue him Everyday Everytime.
One night we were about to sleep I casually asked Kabbir, to call our lovely pet dog to sleep on her bed. He got up went straight to his Chachu(uncle) and started crying “Mumma thinks I am his servant”.
At first I saw his adorable innocent little face and consoled him. “Mumma just asked you to do one little thing, don’t worry I will do it.”
But that night I could not stop thinking about how he reacted, what I asked was not something out of his league?
When I do stuff for my family does that make me a SERVANT?
 Or
This is actually what my kid thinks of me?
 It hit me that whatever we do for kids is out of love not that we are supposed to do it.
But does he know this?
Next two days went by…
Third day I knew what I needed to do, I set up a chore chart for him. When he called out for me I simply stopped everything, told him to have a seat and talked to him. I made him realize that we live in a house and enjoy the goods of household during this process we need to carry out house chores or help each other to do the house jobs this is what being a part of a family is all about , if I do things on your behalf does not make me your servant? it is out of love, compassion and mumma wants to share your work load which you may do sometimes when you see your mum is tired.
mom disciplining kids
Courtesy: Google

 

So get up and start doing your daily chores and helping your mom a bit.

During the coming days I saw the change and realized chores are an important part of kids life just as much as homework, sports or anything else going on in their life.
We modern  parents of India often think we need to raise a boy compassionate and kind but we tend to over-indulge by doing too much for our children and do not expect enough of them, we forget doing chores gives a child the opportunity to give back to their parents for all we do for them. Kids begin to see themselves as important contributors to the family and teach children to respect and be responsible.
At the end I have shared a list of age appropriate chores for toddlers and kids till the age of 5. We mothers might feel it as inappropriate or feel a bit harsh but seriously I have seen changes at my home and would recommend it to fellow moms, do give it a try.
Do not jump in to help yourchild at the slightest hint of a struggle, let him learn and grow.

Here’s a chore chart which you can use or create similar one.

Courtesy: New York Times 

 

-That Imperfect Mom

2 thoughts on “Mumma Thinks I Am His Servant -The Importance of Household Chores”

  1. I superliked the blog. It's a serious issue with the Indian parents mindset that they always think that they can solve each and every problem of their's kids life, but they always forget the thing that they are not going to be with their kids 24×7 or for whole life, and when your kid will be dependent on you, aussume how he/she will face the real life problems when you will be not arround. The most impressive sentence was – “Do not jump in to help yourchild at the slightest hint of a struggle, let him learn and grow”, it's just like the homework your kids get in schools, if you start completing their homework how u can suppose that ur kids will mentally grow by this. Just help them in how to solve real life problems dont stand before them and start solving their problems and homeworks by yourself. This will be the biggest mistake and failure of your as a mother/father if your kids are dependent on you. Love your kids as much as u can, but don't be obsessed about them, and also don't let them obsessed about u, otherwise their are many example of unhealthy marriage just because one of partner is obessed about their parents. Just be them learn to solve every little problem of life by standing behind.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: